Humor: Ring…Ring…Ring…Are You Ready?

Haven’t you already observed a helluva lot of times that your cell phone bursts out ringing at the most awkwardly wrong moments?  Like you’ve lathered up nicely and about to put your razor to work…you mobile rings. You can’t take the risk of answering unless you’d like it to have a shave too. Like you are in the bath happy and singing…you mobile rings. Let be assured that it would’ve been one of the most important calls. Like you are driving and in the worst of traffic situation…you mobile rings…not once, but several times and falls silent when you’ve reached. I’d not rather mention other situations when you feel mad, shamed and damned. However, the situation I suffered recently was as unique as it was hilarious, maddening, exciting and depressing.

That warm evening I along with my wife came out of the supermarket after purchasing mostly grocery items. There were three moderately heavy bags, I was carrying two engaging both of my hands and my wife one. We walked briskly to reach our car so as to unburden ourselves quickly. Midway, to my dismay, I heard my cell phone safely kept in my inner pocket ringing. Thinking it could be important I transferred the load of my right hand to my left and took out the mobile answering it. Now my left hand was carrying two bags and it was becoming real heavy. Our car was still far off.

The call was important. It was the result of my consistent efforts for quite some time in a particular project. Now the caller started feeding me all the details and I knew it was not going to end soon. I reached my car and stood helpless as I could not take out the car key from my back pocket. The road was dirty and so I could not put the bags there, something my wife never liked anyway. My left hand was crying aloud now about to break. My wife was getting annoyed too as she was also carrying one. I motioned her to come close to me and moved my eyes downwards furiously trying to tell, ‘Please take out the key from my back pocket and open the doors’. Not understanding she tried my shirt pocket. Taking a second off from the insistent conversation I brought my mobile down and thrashed it on my back pocket. ‘This is the jackpot! Hit it quick!’

By the time she managed to open the car doors the phone call ended.  

Sideburns! More!

***My grandmother had a thorough way of getting fully posted on any topic the answers to which she might have known already. She used to make sure she had all the details and the necessary action taken. For that she asked the same question at least three times though in varied forms of longer to shorter and to short.  Here is an example of what she used to ask me almost everyday. ‘Dearest, have you eaten your lunch?’ ‘Yes, grandma.’ ‘You have eaten?’ ‘Yes, grandma.’  ‘Eaten, no?’ ‘Yes, grandma!’ I took it as an expression of her tremendous love for me which was the case indeed.

***Greatly angered by inaction of one of his subordinates the boss one day stormed into the subordinate’s room and shouted, ‘Look Mr… My last warning to you! I want results! Don’t continue sitting on the files!’ And he stormed out. The dazed subordinate lifted the cushions of his seat moment the boss left and muttered, ‘What the hell…!’ Not a joke, mind you!

***Once in a project we were trying out young interns for casual work. One lady in a different department used to help us in various ways from technical to routine. That lady knew little English, had a peculiar accent and just managed to convey her thoughts to us. One day she came to my room and said,’ You see… three girls available. You can use if you want!’ Putting on a straight face I asked,’ But have you told them about our consolidated payments?’ ‘Nothing! It’s free!’ I was horrified even though I knew she just conveyed her helpful thoughts!

From Jaipur With Music...

Meantime back from Jaipur--the Pink City--today. Ragini performed in the 43rd Mahashivaratri Sangeet Samaroh there. A breathtaking venue called Gaitore Ki Chhatriya consisting of royal monuments including an ancient Shiva temple and surrounded by hills. A temple of Ganesha on the right atop a steep hill. The color pink is very predominant all around Jaipur. Sawai Man Singh II who was the last ruling monarch of Rajasthan liked this color and made ample use of it in his campaign for modernization of Rajasthan and capital Jaipur. 

A beautiful place to visit. We also visited the Amber Fort and the Jaigarh Fort. The world's largest canon at Jaigarh Fort was really spectacular. Mounted on wheels it has a range of 22 miles and one blast needs 100 kilos of gunpowder. It is said because of terror inspiring defense no enemy dared attack Rajasthan and the canon needed to fire only test blasts.

The Ajmer Dargah Sharif  is world's second most sacred and India's first. People of all religions visit this pilgrimage to fulfill their wishes. Just near Ajmer is a small town called Pushkar which is also a major tourist attraction for its Brahma temple and a lake surrounded by nearly thousand temples. Pushkar is the only place in the world where Lord Brahma is worshiped and there is beautiful story about it.

Sideburns!!!

***At 12 noon, if the Indian ruling coalition announces it’s noon time, the Indian opposition would cry hoarse, ‘ Too little too late! It’s midnight! We demand an enquiry and leave the responsibility of doing so to us!’ So committed to oppose!

***One senior executive has three cars for all the three members of his family. But he has to walk miles everyday for health!

***Online money making sites (so called) tell you how they made millions in minutes or days or maximum one month. But if they are already rolling with millions why they ask you to pay a heavily discounted pittance to join and pitifully offer you nearly a hundred percent discount the moment you try to leave the site! A riddle I cannot solve. 

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